Public Service Announcements

Alive and well, pretty busy over the last week or so. Couple of things that may be of interest to public.

1. Ram uvaacha:

---

Dear All,

If you or your company can donate some old laptops (in working condition of course) to Puvidham it would be a lot of help. I have finally started using computers as part of the school here in Puvidham and I find it will be of use to the children in their learning process. We here at Puvidham are looking at computers as an additional tool (along with books) to help children learn better things like language, mathematics and science.

I am now embarking on a trial of the software created by Educational Initiatives called Mindspark which is a adaptive program to help children learn school mathematics better. Through interaction it is intelligent enough to pose appropriate problems to children. I view this program as an addition to the teacher's efforts so that children master mathematics. For this trial we need additional machines (currently we have only 3 computers in our school).

Why laptops?
a.. We need at least 7 machines to making the learning process meaningful (two students per machine for a class). The physical infrastructure needed in terms of space and rooms for setting up 7 machines is expensive. We can just put away the laptops in an almirah after use.

b.. Laptops are less power hungry and we don't have to worry about UPS etc. We in fact are planning to charge the laptops while they are stored in the almirah through solar power.

c.. Puvidham is not a dust free environment. It is difficult to maintain PCs. We plan to store the laptops in a dust free almirah (a steel cupboard).

Regards,
Ram.

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2. K-Circle, ye olde venerable association of quizzers is hosting the full day K-Circle Quiz Fest on Saturday, 7 March 2009 at the Khemka Auditorium in ISB. It's apparently "Bigger, Tougher, Wittier". Readers will be aware that we are currently defending champions of the thing ;) but may or may not be around to defend titles. Visit KC website for details on timings, registrations etc.

In Solidarity

der aaye par durust aaye?

1. All hail loose, pubgoing, forward women.

Long live the Pink Chaddis. Jai Ho. Hope everyone had a suitably talli day. We had a steak.



2. Via a piece over at Nirmukta, we come to know of a piece, over at The Independent. Johann Hari wrote something called "Why Should I Respect These Oppressive Religions". The Statesman in Calcutta re-printed it.

A bunch of Muslims protested the article, at first peacefully, and then later with embellishments such as blocking roads and attacking policemen (according to this report). Which also seems to have resulted in the arrest of the publisher and the editor. This is apparently what passes for freedom of opinion in these parts nowadays. Hari continues to be unapologetic.

Hari's original piece criticized how certain countries did not seem to find the Universal Declaration of Human Rights good enough, and wrote one of their own. This is a fairly side-splittingly funny read. Basically a mostly "normal" rights document...

2(a) ...Life is a God-given gift and the right to life is guaranteed to every human being. It is the duty of individuals, societies and states to safeguard this right against any violation, and it is prohibited to take away life...
2(d) ...Safety from bodily harm is a guaranteed right. It is the duty of the state to safeguard it, and it is prohibited to breach it...
12 ...Every man shall have the right...to free movement and to select his place of residence whether within or outside his country and if persecuted, is entitled to seek asylum in another country...
16 ... Everyone shall have the right to enjoy the fruits of his scientific, literary, artistic or technical labour of which he is the author; and he shall have the right to the protection of his moral and material interests stemming therefrom, ...
22(a)...Everyone shall have the right to express his opinion freely...

Except of course, that in full they read

2(a) Life is a God-given gift and the right to life is guaranteed to every human being. It is the duty of individuals, societies and states to safeguard this right against any violation, and it is prohibited to take away life except for a shari'ah prescribed reason.
2(d) Safety from bodily harm is a guaranteed right. It is the duty of the state to safeguard it, and it is prohibited to breach it without a Shari'ah-prescribed reason.
12 Every man shall have the right, within the framework of the Shari'ah, to free movement and to select his place of residence whether within or outside his country and if persecuted, is entitled to seek asylum in another country.
16 Everyone shall have the right to enjoy the fruits of his scientific, literary, artistic or technical labour of which he is the author; and he shall have the right to the protection of his moral and material interests stemming therefrom, provided it is not contrary to the principles of the Shari'ah.
22(a) Everyone shall have the right to express his opinion freely in such manner as would not be contrary to the principles of the Shari'ah.

In other words, everything is permitted, except what is not. Sigh. Of course, in the interest of being equal opportunity offenders, we should say that the Ram Sene version of the UDHR will likely be equally entertaining.

This whole idea of respecting everything is problematic, to say the least. A brief discussion happened in the comments over at CSM's some time back. A relevant link to British philosopher Simon Blackburn's 25 page essay, "Religion and Respect". Excerpts:

'Respect' of course is a tricky term. I may respect your gardening by just letting you get on with it. Or, I may respect it by admiring it and regarding it as a superior way to garden. The word seems to span a spectrum, from simply not interfering, passing by on the other side, through admiration, right up to reverence and deference. This makes it uniquely well-placed for ideological purposes. People might start out by insisting on respect in the minimal sense, and in a generally liberal world they may not find it too difficult to obtain it. But then what we might call respect creep sets in, where the request for minimal toleration turns into a demand for more substantial respect, such as fellow-feeling, or esteem, and finally deference and reverence. In the limit, unless you let me take over your mind and your life, you are not showing proper respect for my religious or ideological convictions...
...We can respect, in the minimal sense of tolerating, those who hold false beliefs. We can pass by on the other side. We need not be concerned to change them, and in a liberal society we do not seek to suppress them or silence them. But once we are convinced that a belief is false, or even just that it is irrational, we cannot respect in any thicker sense those who hold it--not on account of their holding it. We may respect them for all sorts of other qualities, but not that one. We would prefer them to change their minds.

Well put, we thought.

PJ du jour

This one is thanks to Shweta, who reports that she sounds like this gentleman. Rudimentary knowledge of Tamizh cinema is helpful.

If Kamal Haasan played Luke Skywalker in a Tamizh version of "Return of the Jedi", what would it be called?

Vader Magan

Why Ludwig Ought To Feel Happier About The One

0. We've generally been known to be somewhat (uncharacteristically) cynical about The One. "What's the big deal?", "How would things be any different if Hillary had won, or for that matter any Democrat?" etc. type koschans have been used to needle people their warmfuzziness about Him. However someone (who will mysteriously be referred to as The Giggler, on account of apparently uncontrollable gigglings at the thought of the Kwisatz Haderach in the White House), used this highly effective angle of attack to illustrate her point (chat transcript follows):

G: lets put it this way
G: it is like how your friends and family would feel



G: if you were dating a bollywood bimbo and then decided to date nandita das
G: she might not change the world
but atleast it is nice
very nice, warm and fuzzy

G: for everyone

G: so now you see the source of all the giggles

G: we are still making bollywood movies
but with nandita das
and not amrita rao
or kareena kapoor

Highly effective, non? Kinda see the point now.

May He bring balance to the Force. With or without mitochondria. Or is it midi-chlorians? WTF was Georgie Porgie smoking?

1. Ironic newspaper headline of the year award (via CSM) goes to this one:

Name your children in Tamil: Stalin

2. Cosmic Variance, has a highly readable piece called The Sacred. Sean Carroll writes about the problem he sees with using words like "sacred" and "spiritual" to qualify things we say about the wonders of the cosmos.

...When you start talking about “spirituality,” people are going to take you to mean something that goes beyond the laws of nature, in the sense of being incompatible with them, not just “hard to understand in terms of them” — something supernatural...
...The puzzles of human life, and our mutual sense of wonder, and a feeling of awe when confronted with the cosmos, are all perfectly respectable topics for discussion. And there exists perfectly respectable vocabularies for discussing them, that don’t come laden with unfortunate supernatural overtones: literature, anthropology, psychology, the arts, and so on. There is a huge disadvantage to throwing around words like “sacred” and “spiritual,” in that you will very frequently be understood (misunderstood, one hopes) to be talking about the supernatural...
...But there is a deeper point, which is consistently missed by the gentle-minded/accommodationist/agnostic/liberal-religious/sophisticated-theology segment of the debate: It’s Not About You. Richard Dawkins was not addressing this kind of touchy-feely non-interventionist religion, for the excellent reason that it doesn’t match up with what the overwhelming majority of religious believers actually believe...

There are lots of comments that argue both sides of Carroll's point, and are quite engrossing. There's a link in the article to another earlier and longer piece called The God Conundrum which is also quite interesting.

This is all apropos of a couple of weeks old post and back and forth (in the comments) at chez SVyas that one hasn't found the time, internet connection, or lucid thought to post a comment on.

3. The Mumbai Half Marathon was duly attempted again this year. Kenny has the dope. We did better time than last year, but Lud. lost the mindgame, as was widely reported in Indian media. The whole 2:00:00 mark is turning into an obsession. So we did precisely nothing about it and have been sitting and increasing the size of butt for the last week. Passing it off as post-event depression. The sandbagging dolphin also ran, cold turkey, and is rumored to have finished.

Post run, much fun came, in the form of beer and bowling in the company of Kenny, monster, CSM, and various other juntae.

4. One side-effect of having to pick up the bib was that we lost our way and somehow ended up in Strand Book Stall in Fort. They happened to be having their annual sale. Strange coincidence. 3 books that must be mentioned, since we haven't done lists in so long

• Predictably Irrational - which came to us via NPR. Sounded fascinating on the radio, deals with such things as

  Do you know why we so often promise ourselves to diet and exercise, only to have the thought vanish when the dessert cart rolls by?
  
  Do you know why we sometimes find ourselves excitedly buying things we don’t really need?
  
  Do you know why we still have a headache after taking a five-cent aspirin, but why that same headache vanishes when the aspirin costs 50 cents?
  
  Do you know why people who have been asked to recall the Ten Commandments tend to be more honest (at least immediately afterward) than those who haven’t? Or why honor codes actually do reduce dishonesty in the workplace?

• Ambedkar: Towards an Enlightened India
• Dreams of a Final Theory - The Scientist's Search for the Ultimate Laws of Nature by Stephen Weinberg. Fascinating book, even if somewhat difficult to read in parts on account of the physics. From the Amazon page:

  In his celebrated book The First Three Minutes (Basic, 1977; 1988, reprint) Nobel laureate Weinberg wrote the ominous and oft-quoted remark "The more the universe seems comprehensible, the more it seems pointless." This book can be seen as his response to that remark after 15 years of reflection and scientific progress. Weinberg writes with great hope and clarity about the possibility that science can find a universal theory uniting the laws of nature into a single statement that is mathematically, philosophically, and aesthetically complete. His writing is technical in places, and some of the first-person narratives come off as less than humble, but overall Weinberg offers excellent insights on how such a theory could be realized and what it would mean. Especially engaging are his chapters, "Beautiful Theories" and "What About God?" Other books have been written on this subject (e.g., Paul Davies's Superforce , LJ 11/15/84; John Barrow's Theories of Everything , Oxford Univ. Pr., 1991; and Barry Parker's Search for a Supertheory , Plenum, 1987), but Weinberg's is likely to have the highest demand. Highly recommended.

  Weinberg has some interesting cribs with philosophers and devotes the "Against Philosophy" chapter to it.

  The value today of philosophy to physics seems to me to be something like the value of early nation-states to their peoples. It is only a small exaggeration to say that, until the introduction of the post office, the chief service of nation-states was to protect their peoples from other nation-states. The insights of philosophers have occasionally benefited physicists, but generally in a negative fashion—by protecting them from the preconceptions of other philosophers...
  
  ...Wittgenstein remarked that "nothing seems to me less likely than that a scientist or mathematician who reads me should be seriously influenced in the way he works."...
  
  ...Even where philosophical doctrines have in the past been useful to scientists, they have generally lingered on too long, becoming of more harm than ever they were of use...

  He writes about the problems he has with metaphysics (causing people to hang on to ideas/ideologies long after they've ceased to be useful) and epistemology (specifically logical positivism and it's demand that all aspects of scientific theories must refer to quantities that are (in principle) observable). The biggest problem he has, though, is with what he calls relativism.

  Metaphysics and epistemology have at least been intended to play a constructive role in science. In recent years science has come under attack from unfriendly commentators joined under the banner of relativism. The philosophical relativists deny the claim of science to the discovery of objective truth; they see it as merely another social phenomenon, not fundamentally different from a fertility cult or a potlatch.
  Philosophical relativism stems in part from the discovery by philosophers and historians of science that there is a large subjective element in the process by which scientific ideas become accepted. We have seen here the role that aesthetic judgments play in the acceptance of new physical theories. This much is an old story to scientists (though philosophers and historians sometimes write as if we were utterly naive about this)...
  
  ...It is simply a logical fallacy to go from the observation that science is a social process to the conclusion that the final product, our scientific theories, is what it is because of the social and historical forces acting in this process. A party of mountain climbers may argue over the best path to the peak, and these arguments may be conditioned by the history and social structure of the expedition, but in the end either they find a good path to the peak or they do not, and when they get there they know it...
  
  ...I suspect that Gerald Holton is close to the truth in seeing the radical attack on science as one symptom of a broader hostility to Western civilization that has bedeviled Western intellectuals from Oswald Spengler on. Modern science is an obvious target for this hostility; great art and literature have sprung from many of the world's civilizations, but ever since Galileo scientific research has been overwhelmingly dominated by the West.
  This hostility seems to me to be tragically misdirected. Even the most frightening Western applications of science such as nuclear weapons represent just one more example of mankind's timeless efforts to destroy itself with whatever weapons it can devise. Balancing this against the benign applications of science and its role in liberating the human spirit, I think that modern science, along with democracy and contrapuntal music, is something that the West has given the world in which we should take special pride.
  In the end this issue will disappear. Modern scientific methods and knowledge have rapidly diffused to non-Western countries like Japan and India and indeed are spreading throughout the world. We can look forward to the day when science can no longer be identified with the West but is seen as the shared possession of humankind...

  If this sort of thing interests you, the entire chapter is available for download here. (PDF) Phew. Too much cutting and pasting only. Lots of videos of Weinberg are also available.

Shit Happens

But there are ways of dealing with it, if you want to. Highly readable post at Siva's.

Happy 2009, all.

Group Hug Finito

In which we blog from the Hyderabad Express, somewhere between Sullurpeta and Nellore

The revels are now ended. 3 days of hobnobbing and meeting lots of old faces, though not all the ones we would've loved to. Highlights

• 2 runs, one on campus and one off, in the company of Kenny, her friend (now nationalized), and the Nitwit. Much fun, and very high speed. The flesh is capable of more than we had suspected.
• Visited hostel room, used several unprintable words on cowering occupant, and hung out in general
• Quote of the weekend comes (not surprisingly) from someone who is not an alum or even an engineer. Prof. Sen, (Abi has more), when asked, "Oh sir, what can we do to make India the next superpower, please tell us." says, "I don't know about you, but I don't have the least bit of interest in India becoming a superpower." Surprised quite a few people, I daresay. The loud and lonely clapping you heard from the extreme back row of SAC was yours truly.
• One of the Women in Science and Technology sessions which we quietly slunk into to meet her who first forwarded us the WTF link was quite absorbing. Indeed, the WTF was mentioned, we're very proud of our baby
• Dinner at Benjarong and breakfast with Siva, Gaseous Beyondus, and other respected elders
• Sign on shop in Mylapore: "We do all kinds of grill work, welding and gollasible gates!" Gollasible gates! Mommee, we wants!!

Apparently such worthies as Abi and Choxbox were around, and were not met so that's a bit of a bummer. And no kili josier, which was devastating. More will be shared later. Typing with T9 is quite painful beyond a point...

Quick Bangalore Thoughts

Got in this morning. Getting out tomorrow evening. Salient points:

1. Freezing.

2. It's unbelievable, but Malleswaram does not seem to have a single darshini style eatery. Was ravishing when stepping off the train, full of anticipation of pongal and suchlike poisons but, to quote J. Krishnamurthi once said, "Malleswaram is an idliless land." Positively reeks of business opportunity.

3. Bought milk. Which is not unusual. Sibling who normally takes care of these womanly chores with alacrity, is not in town. So bought milk, some Nandini thing. Immensely gratifying tag line, "Quality excellence, from cow to consumer." Immediate ideas of extending said line up and down the dairy supply chain spring to mind. "Quality excellence, from grass to gastrointestinal tract." "Quality excellence, from topsoil to toilet." "Quality excellence..." Really, one could go on. The remaining possibilities are left as an exercise for the reader.

The packet also has said slogan in Kannada. It says, "Qualitydalli excellencu, aavimda giraakivarege." Or something.

4. Running suggestions in/around Malleswaram will be appreciated. 12 km. needed.

5. You can smell sampangi poovus on Sampige Road!

6. Soon, our minds will be read.

7. Australopithecus is hereby nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for 2009. For unearthing this. Not safe for work.

8. Finally a few concerned citizens are starting to something practical about terrorism. See 1, 2.

9. So is this pig.

10. Apparently, the porker is critical. This is what you get if you do too many laps without hydration, carbs and a warm-up routine. Or if you're a pig circumambulating a pillar endlessly with uniform angular velocity and no nutrition. And while we're on the subject, this video of Christopher Walken reading "Three Little Pigs" is highly watchable.

Sampoorna Webpage Rewrite

Everyone knows WTF this is about, no?

A revisit to the group hug homepage reveals that the page in question has disappeared! Voila! Instead, we now have For the Family.

The theme for the Family track for this year's Global Conference is "Sampoorna – For the Whole Family".

In a reasonably clever move that prevents the raising of further blogical fingers, it says:

(All delegates to the conference, and any of their family members, are free to attend not only the sessions at Sampoorna, but any of the sessions making up the 6 thematic tracks, and the plenary sessions.)

Everyone can go everywhere, snail is on thorn and lark is deeply engrossed in an energetic rendition of Kumbaya.

There's still an undercurrent of mumbo jumbo, mind you.

The event explores through music and dance the impact of the five elements of the world, how it is being abused, and remedial measures that can be taken to stop the ecological disaster staring us in the face.

But we are going to strictly implement the advice Paul's mother Mary proffered.

The Mystic Trail has disappeared completely, instead you can play chess with Vishwanathan Anand (or Vandy, as he will be called on campus). All said and done a reasonably satisfactory conclusion, even if Shilpa Shetty is giving it a miss.

On campus investigations revealed the following.

1. The Mystic Trail was supposed to be more of a "gag" like thing all along, apparently. Of course, that wasn't entirely clear from the website. Anyway, good riddance. Hopefully the heartbroken josier is not lurking on Sardar Patel Road threatening to release his kili on unsuspecting visitors.

2. So, it turns out that the powers that be initially received lots of email and feedback about the WTF. This was given the same treatment that Dravid gives balls outside the off stump in Test matches. However (and here's the rub), the delicate stink from this whole affair had percolated through the blog world (thanks to A-list academic blogger types) and in mainstream media in a small way.

This caused a certain very very very important sponsor to apparently gently hint that changes in the programme would be "appreciated", and hey presto. Paisa bolta hai.

At the Choultry we're all extremely thrilled that the whole thing started off here. In the past, we've hinted at the duties of conscientious bloggers and so on, and apparently we were right. Anyway, that's that. Next, we are composing a rant on global poverty and we are sure there will be a similar speedy resolution to the same.

On Living

Which we post mainly so that we don't lose this poem

On Living
         - Nazim Hikmet

Living is no laughing matter:
You must live with great seriousness
Like a squirrel, for example -
I mean without looking for something beyond and above living,
I mean living must be your whole occupation.
Living is no laughing matter…
I mean, you must take living so seriously
that even at seventy for example, you’ll plant olive trees -
and not just for your children either,
but because although you fear death you don’t believe it,
because living, I mean, weighs heavier... .

Let’s say we’re at the front -
for something worth fighting for, say.
There, in the first offensive, on that very day,
We might fall on our face, dead.
We’ll know this with a curious anger,
But we’ll still worry ourselves to death
About the outcome of the war, which could last years.

Let’s say we’re in prison
And close to fifty,
And we have eighteen more years, say,
Before the iron doors will open.
We’ll still live with the outside,
With its people and animals, struggle and wind - I mean with the outside beyond the walls.
I mean, however and wherever we are,
We must live as if we will never die.

This earth will grow cold,
a star among stars, and one of the smallest,
a gilded mote on blue velvet -
I mean this, our great earth.
This great earth will grow cold one day...
Like an empty walnut it will roll along
in pitch-black space...
You must grieve for this right now
- you have to feel this sorrow now -
for the world must be loved this much
if you’re going to say, "I lived"...

Translated by Randy Basing and Mutlu Konuk

Found over at Kafila at the end of a very readable piece by Nivedita Menon.

One Possible Reason For The Economic Downturn

Seen today in the Q&A section of a prominent Indian portal:

Iam loss more than one lakhs in intraday trading, in 5 months there is possible for refund that money?

So these are the sorts of people who invest in the stock market.

Ans: "Dear Sir, of course it's possible to get a refund and I can help with the same. There will be a small downpayment of Rs. 50, 000 for which you can pay me in cash. Also, if you're interested, I am the owner of a large plot of land in western UP that I can offer you for a nominal rate. It is riverfront property with landscaped gardens and a semi-residential marble building constructed in the 17th century in the centre. Rs. 3 lakhs only."

What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

Exhibit A

The book is (thankfully) back. Phew. Excerpt:

I'm often asked what I think about as I run. Usually the people who ask this have never run long distances themselves. I always ponder the question. What exactly do I think about when I'm running? I don't have a clue.

On cold days I guess I think a little about how cold it is. And about the heat on hot days. When I'm sad I think a little about sadness. When I'm happy I think a little about happiness. As I mentioned before, random memories come to me too. And occasionally, hardly ever, really, I get an idea to use in a novel. But really as I run, I don't think much of anything worth mentioning.

I just run. I run in a void. Or maybe I should put it the other way. I run in order to acquire a void. But as you might expect, an occasional thought will slip into this mind. People's minds can't be a complete blank. Human beings' emotions are not strong or consistent enough to sustain a vacuum. What I mean is, the kinds of thoughts and ideas that invade my emotions as I run remain subordinate to that void. Lacking content, they are just random thoughts that gather around that central void.

The thoughts that occur to me while I'm running are like clouds in the sky. Clouds of all different sizes. They come and they go, while the sky remains the same sky as always. The clouds are mere guests in the sky that pass away and vanish, leaving behind the sky. The sky both exists and doesn't exist. It has substance and at the same time it doesn't. And we merely accept that vast expanse and drink it in.

Almost Ruskin Bond-esque in its simplicity, but touches several chords.

Exhibit B

From the last scene:

So where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within. Jenny, I believe that God made me for a purpose. He also made me fast. And when I run, I feel his pleasure.

Exhibit C

All of which is a timely cue to revisit Sex Without Love.

Famous Last Words Dept (# 1)

Pre-requisite: Knowledge of Dravidian tongue, preferably Tamizh

King Pandu: Oru maadiri feeling..."

Heh.

Songs I Would've Loved To Dance To (And A Dark Secret)

Of course, a whole other gigantic post is waiting. Long time, no post. Long to post, no time. In lieu, and mourning the demise of Worldspace in advance, we present 5 a few Indian film songs which we would've loved to dance to if we had the talent, necessity, insobriety, etc. In no particular order.

Song 1



Almost any Shammi song, of course. This one is merely one of the genre.

Song 2



For a movie of such overwhelming obscurity, Gumnaam is remarkable in that it has another eminently danceable song.

Song 3



Yes. Seriously. Ah woood, if ah coood.

Song 4



Ditto. Good ol' Madras in the mid-90s.

Song 5



Is actually marginally ahead of #4 in the list, but only remembered it now.

Song 6



An old favourite and a classic, even if there isn't much by way of dancing happening. Mmm. Amala.

Song 7



Oh, the 80s. Those trousers, that rhythm, those "steps", Maruti 800s and Premier Padminis, that tinny voice, ta-ta-ta-tatiyaow, ta-ta-ta-tatiyaow.

Song 8



We were looking for the Telugu version, which appears to not be available online.

Song 9



The latest and greatest. KK Menon is in fact the best dancer in Indian cinema. Ever.

Song 10



A deep, dark secret. Used to be utterly obsessed with this song for a period of about 6 months in 2001-2002. Not that we would want to actually dance to this song. Would we?


Would we?

Your turn(s).

WTF Of The Century

We are are very busy but interrupting normal programming to bring you this news flash. This has got to get enough eyeballs before they change/remove the page. Just got to know about this via email.

--- Begin Rant ---

The good 'ol alma mater is hosting this year's love fest/group hug/what you will. So while all the boys are hanging out comparing each others' dicks and portfolios and dislocating their arms patting themselves and each other on the back, hey the "spouses" need not worry. It's all taken care of, you won't be bored and sidelined. See what the page says:

While the IITian chooses to inspire, innovate and transform, here is an exclusive track designed to keep Spouses and Families completely informed and entertained.

The theme for the spouses' track in this year's PANIIT is "Sampoorna" - programs meant for the complete woman, who is able to perfectly balance her personal, professional and public personality. With this in mind we have a galaxy of presenters and performers who are bound to enlighten the IIT spouses.

Here's a little bit of mind-boggling deductive reasoning:

1. All the spouses of IIT alums are women.
2. Some IIT alums are married women.
3. Ergo all married women alumnae are married to women.

Someone needs to tell Kenny, Choxbox and who knows how many more of them to wake up and smell the coffee. There's a duties-of-a-wife poster that someone (SB, BM, Veena?) posted a link to once and we can't find. This is taking that to a new level. 21st century version.

If all this wasn't so thrilling in of itself, there is more later in the page.

Mystic Trail
In the afternoon our Mystic Trail will take you through some of India's most well known practices such as Astrology, Palmistry, Gemology, Nadi and Kili Josiyam.

WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? factorial(WTF)^{factorial(WTF)}. This is a gigantic WTF, believe you me. In WTFland, it's called the WTGoogolplexF. And WTF doesn't HTML support the raising of WTF!s to powers of powers of powers of WTF!s?

Please excuse while we go off and burst some blood vessels.

Unfuckingbelievable.

And the sting in the tail.

Prepare yourselves for a close encounter with spirituality, fitness and food.

Shilpa Shetty
Start your day with an interactive session...

This is really the only session that seems worth attending at the whole conference at this point, but ah, read the fine print.

(awaiting confirmation)

Nonsense fellows.

--- EndRant ---

OK, back to the grind. Regular programming will resume after the saarangi vaadan is done with. Anon.

The Best Hindi Movie Song Ever

We've believed this to be true for a long time, and have seen no reason to change. Yet.



Caveat: By "best" we mean the best "overall" performance, there are admittedly more soulful lyrics, more dulcet voices, superior music, possibly better cinematography (Really? Where?), better actors, better movies etc. but as a complete package, not many things come close.

Cinematographer talks about shooting the scene:



A long 3 part audio interview with him is available.

More Photos, Nerdy Things, Pictures, And Sundry Items Which Are The Staple Here

-1. Ho Ho



0. Nerd Joke Alert
One for the nerds, let's get it outta the way pronto.

"There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who think in base 2, and those who don't."

1. How You Just Missed Making A Potload Of Money (But It Involved Mathematics)

A Mersenne Prime is a prime number that may be expressed in the form 2ⁿ - 1. Only 46 Mersenne primes are known, but it is possible that there is an infinitude of them lurking.

The Great Internet Mersenne Prime Search project has discovered the last 12, each of which except for the latest one was the largest known prime at the time of discovery. GIMPS works by distributing the computational work between volunteers' PCs. The GIMPS program runs when the PC is idle, quietly churning away.

GIMPS announced that prime nos. 45 and 46 were discovered in a space of 3 weeks on August 23 and September 6, which is pretty amazing. The person on whose computer #45 was discovered (Edson Smith who maintains computers for UCLA) gets $100,000 for discovering the first prime number with > 10 million digits. $100,000! And all you had to do was lend your computer. Suckers.

2. Oracellae And Such

The Marine Mammals Conservation Network of India has a new website. We have written about our encounters with marine mammals before, including this one. Nowadays, when we go running, we actually feel like a stranded marine mammal, that's what the cardio-vascular-respiratory system has become.

Be that as it may, do check out the website. Lots and lots of information, including much of Kumaran Sathasivam's excellent book on the Marine Mammals of India. Sekk it out, I say.

3. 'I'm going to die on Monday at 6.15pm'

Points to ponder. Reader discretion advised.

"When Marc Weide's mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, she chose euthanasia. Here, we publish his shockingly frank diary of her final days."

4. Love Theme

The Love Theme in RitiGowla is poised on a knife edge. Chapter V came out some time back, and faithful readers are clamouring for more and threatening homicide. If you go now, you can read all 5 and be all up to date, otherwise too many episodes will have passed, and this is not some 'Shanti' or 'Swabhiman' or 'The Pearl' that you can open the page anywhere and start yensoying. What do you think this is, book cricket?

5. Photoos


Begumpet, Onam eve (it-is-a-camel.com)


Alwal, Onammmm...


Early morning, 15th August, Madras Central station. We kid you not, this fellow was hanging out aaraam se in the middle of that gigantic concourse.

And that's that.

More Science Videos

Over at Wired Science, they've put up a list of the Top 10 Amazing Physics Videos. #1 is the recently famous "LHC Rap" thing.

And via Abi, we come to a video by something called Marie Curie Actions For Teens. How to explain chemical reactions to teens, is what it deals with. And so funny.

You must've been living in a hole if you haven't heard that approximately now, the people in white coats at CERN are going to fire up their latest toy and see what happens. Note that hadrons aren't colliding yet, this is just a dry run to send a beam of protons in one direction around the supercollider.

The good people over at Cosmic Variance are "live blogging" the event. The last entry as of this writing says, "Reporting now from the High Energy Physics conference room here at Caltech. In an hour and a half we’ll open a live feed to our colleagues at CERN, who will be updating us on what happens." And CERN has a webcast, if that's what you're looking for.

Are you wondering if the Large Hadron Collider has destroyed the world yet?

And finally, a medieval helpdesk video:



In Norwegian, with English subtitles.

Books, Award, Railway Wagons, Optimal Kerchief Management, God, Pigeons, Outlook Traveller, Graphic Novels, Vinayaka Chaturthi, Disease (With Pics)

Where we regurgitate everything

0. Books

Lots and lots of people are borrowing our books nowadays. We've resorted to using reminders on the trusty E51.

So far we know that Emma has Sea of Poppies; the Nitwit has What I Talk About When I Talk About Running; Mango Indian has A Short History of Nearly Everything, The God Delusion, India: A History, and a couple of Eddie Izzard DVDs; the girl upstairs has Santorini, The Five Dollar Smile: And Other Stories (yes, a moment of weakness); and the neighbour uncle has The Unquiet Woods and Textures of Time: Writing History in South India 1600-1800. So all of you beware.

Someone, but someone has our copy of Norwegian Wood. If you're reading this, holler. The other Murakamis on the shelf are beginning to miss this one.

Speaking of which, the running book is unmissable, especially if you've had running and/or writing ambitions and lived in Cambridge, MA or Japan. One of the good things is that it de-mystifies Murakami quite a bit, and suddenly he is this ordinary runner guy (well, sort of, he runs one marathon every year) with ordinary running troubles. Lots of little things resonate for anyone who has engaged in long distance running. For example, that mysterious question that non-runners will pose, "What do you think about when you're running?" It's a bit of a baffling question for someone who's past the 10 mile mark. What are we thinking about? Nothing, really. To put it in a different way, who the fuck knows? It's a strange state, quasi-meditative, self-transcending and what have you. The book results in repeated mental revisits of Sharon Olds poem.

1. Awards

The good Imam has done the unthinkable and nominated us for some pink coloured award. Thank you, thank you. Curiously enough, Pragya (who through a complicated and unfathomable chain of links has been lurking here) also nominated us for said pinkie. Thank you, thank you. Now we needst pass it on. So here goes. Pretty much the only rule we're following in this is that the blog has to be a personal blog we read regularly and is not already on the blogroll.

1. Australopithecus - Sample: "Another thing that worries me about these Americans is the use of the word momentarily. I almost shat in my trousers when the pilot announced 'we shall take off momentarily'."

2. Barmy in Wonderland - For kaaryakshetra adhyayan and suchlike. Also for contributing some mufat ka gyaan.

3. Wisecandyman - Who will surely one day shuffle off the mortal coil during the video question at a quiz shortly after he has consumed industrial quantities of esoteric cuisine, thus neatly bundling all his passions into one compact event.

4. The River's Wing - Who really ought to write more often.

OK, that's it, have lost enthu. There's still a boatload of stuff to write in this post. Sue us. And we set all these worthies free of the obligation to continue the tag. So there. Muhaha.

Speaking of awards, we made a little bit of money at the Landmark Quiz on Aug 15 in Madras. This has duly been spent in Landmark on such things as The Watchmen; Common Sense and The Rights of Man by Thomas Paine; The Open Society and Its Enemies; I, Claudius etc. One of these days we'll write the definitive What Rs. x,000 Buys You At Landmark post, but till then what Rs. 3,000 can get you at Landmark is diddly squat.

3. Railway Wagons

A lot of time has lately been spent on trains, as readers will doubtless be aware. It's been very pretty too, what with all the rain and lushness. Behold, somewhere in northern Andhra Pradesh, dusk, Howrah-Madras Mail.




And there's the Godavari, all pregnant and ominous. Is there such a thing of joy as a bowstring girder in the middle distance?


But on these journeys, such of us who are wont to worry about such things, are plagued with unanswered questions of the following nature. Ever so often, you will pass a railway siding or a freight marshaling yard where there invariably are forlorn looking goods wagons lying about. This is a heartbreaking sight, especially at dusk, when there is a slight drizzle, especially. They look orphaned in a way that your average passenger coach never does.

The worst ones are from the far off railways. Nothing is more tragic than a rusting North East Frontier Railway wagon on an Erode siding, catching the last rays of the sun refracting through a light shower, silently watching the Salem and Coimbatore bound traffic thunder by with nary a care... Makes you cry. Oh, once in a while you'll find an engine that's as far removed from home as our wagon. A Tughlakabad WAG-5 in Thootukudi is nowadays not an unusual sight, but it's different for locomotives isn't it? The key word being locomotive. The thing could find its way to Delhi or Dehradun if it wanted to, innit?

Not so for the poor goods wagon. It's in our mind's eye, lying there silently in the gloaming, at the foothills of the Nilgiris. Meanwhile a clerk in Bongaigaon or Dibrugarh scratches out its serial number from a long list in a smudge-ridden, dog-eared, ledger in a dusty office in the Brahmaputra valley. Sigh. Think about it, the next time you see one of these.

4. Optimal Kerchief Management

Is this even possible? Are we to resign ourselves to the sad truth that there is a black hole or other such spacetime anomaly in the cupboard, into which kerchiefs disappear? We've bought 20 kerchiefs in the last year, and can barely find one when we need it. In pensive moments, we break into song. With Bong accent. "Bhere do you go, my lobhely? I bhant to no..." Where do they go? (That song, by the way, is one of those instantly evocative take-me-back-to-the-90s-when-STAR-TV-had-just-been-invented specimens.)

Is there some way of ensuring that all times 3-6 clean handkerchiefs are available for consumption in some easily accessible place? Please help.

5. God

See 6.

6. Pigeons

Assumption: There is no god. Therefore, species evolve according Darwinian principles of natural selection and genetic mutation.

(i) Pigeons exist.
(ii) They are unquestionably the dumbest creatures on the planet. Staring deeply into a pigeon's eyes for about 3 milliseconds will make this truth instantly self-evident. If you aren't convinced, send us an application in triplicate and we will put a post on such topics as "pigeons; IQ of", "pigeons; cranial cubic capacity of", "pigeons; taste of" and so on which will doubtless convince you.
(iii) And yet they flourish. By the gazillion. If natural selection and all those fairy tales were true, they would at least have to have gone the way of the Kakapo or the Jerdon's Courser. But, nahiin. They darken the skies with their pestilential coochiings and cooings, and dive-bomb terrified, helpless Grand Slam winners. Did they go off in some distant past and engage in some ghoulish coupling with Stuka (Junkers Ju 87)?

Anyway, they exist, and seem to thrive.
(iv) Assumption must be wrong. Ergo, god exists.

Corollary: Given this sort of blatant bias towards an unfit species, the only logical explanation is that the biased One is Itself one of the beneficiaries. Ergo god is a Pigeon.

Jai Guttur Dev.

6. Outlook Traveler

Hah. Thanks are due again to Lesley because the Konaseema piece is finally out in print. Outlook Traveller recently released their 45 Weekend Getaways from Hyderabad book. It's not in the stores yet, but we have an author copy ("author copy", "author copy", oh delicious sound) and find that we're rubbing shoulders with the likes of William Dalrymple and Sheetal and are very kicked. Please buy in industrial quantities.

7. Graphic Novels

Who would've thought that there's something new to discover once you're 30+? As Jamesh Bond put it, "Never Shay Never Again" or whatever. Lately we have been lapping up these ones. That Man Keynes With His Execrable Urdu started us off by gifting us Maus and Persepolis. Then along came El Spaniardo with Amruta Patil's Kari, and the alea was well and truly iacta est. Latest couple of bouts of bookbuying have resulted in Tezuka's Buddha and the aforementioned Watchmen joining the ranks. Are we done? Do we need to do more? Sin City and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen beckon, but not much else.

It is so important to have all the volumes just so in the shelf, don't you think?

Popper, Calvino, Moore, Window, Balcony, Laundry (A Juxtaposition)

8. Happy Pillayar Day

Today it is. We spent some quiet time in the evening on the terrace and thought we'll share some of the pictures with our hapless breathless readers.

The view from the balcony

Sunset - I

Sunset - II
Close observation will reveal a sliver of moon that has been causing hullaballoo in certain parts.

Sunset - III

Sunset - IV

Silhouette - Self Portrait

Jalebi vendor - Begumpet

puja pandal, apni galli mein

9. Disease

We have mumps.

10. Bonus

Does anybody remember this?

Zing Thing

Found in a 1980s copy of a magazine/Indrajal comic on the CFL premises. Brought back some memories. Was it good for you too?

Of Walt Whitman, Thread Deadlock And Suchlike Pandaemonium

Substitute all the dining philosophers with blog posts waiting to be aired, and this more or less describes the situation.

Song of Myself

Do I not blogpost often myself?
Very well then I do not blogpost myself,
(I am large (you bet!), I contain many blogposts.)

Among the posts jostling inside are the following

• Random travelogue with pictures and so on of trip to parts south


• Long-ish thing continuing where we left off on the neural Buddhism thing, with brief detours into why religions suck, why it's not reasonable for well off middle-and-higher class types to run off to people like Sri Sri Sri (how many nowadays?) Ravi Shankar expecting peace and happiness, why there is no god, why there is a god and She is probably a Pigeon and so on


• Why we've taken to graphic novels in our dotage, and how it has completely flabbergasted and flummoxed us that we'd actually get interested in a new art form at this late stage in life


• A little something on Murakami's latest which being a combination of Murakami, writing, running, and Boston/Cambridge is utterly irresistible


• A review of A Sea of Poppies which we volunteered in a moment of insanity for well known Peruvian junkie but didn't do and instead got beaten to it by el Spaniardo


• Lots more Large Hadron Collider stuff, including the LHC rap thing which is hilarious and en passant I Will Derive which is also funny (but very nerdy)

And so on. It'll all have to wait.

Exeunt.

Ghazal Du Jour

Why write something when someone has already said it and you can copy-paste?

itanii muddat baad mile ho
kin socho.n me.n gum rahate ho

tez havaa ne mujh se puuchhaa
ret pe kyaa likhate rahate ho
kin socho.n me.n gum rahate ho

kaun sii baat hai tum me.n aisii
itane achchhe kyo.n lagate ho
kin socho.n me.n gum rahate ho

ham se na puuchho hijr ke qisse
apanii kaho ab tum kaise ho
kin socho.n me.n gum rahate ho

-- Mohsin Naqvi

Ghulam Ali sings.

The most famous Mohsin-Ghulam Ali combo offer is of course ye dil ye paagal dil mera, kyon bujh gayaa avaargii. Video.

But itanii muddat has more kashish for us, what to say?